Moving with Kids

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As you’re preparing to move…

Don’t force your child to throw out toys, clothes or other personal belongings now. Wait until after the move to sort items and clean things out.
Talk about the move often and focus on the positive things that will come out of it.
Don’t over-idealize your new home and neighborhood. Your child may develop unrealistic expectations and be set up for a let-down after the move.
If your child can use a computer, use the Internet to research your new community. Direct them to town websites that may contain information on clubs, religious groups, social activities and other points of interest that can take the mystery and anxiety out of moving.
Set up a schedule of when things are going to happen: moving day, the first day in your new home, the first day of school. Write these events on a calendar and post it in a prominent place so that nothing comes as a shock.

Just before the move…

Allow your child to have some time to say goodbye to friends. You might want to give them an address book so that they can write down a way to contact these friends.
Have your child pack a special box of belongings that they want to have as soon as you move. This reassures them that their old life is not going away completely.
Allow your child to cry and don’t feel bad if you are teary too. It is good for your child to see that they are not alone in these feelings. For both you and your family, however, it is best to try and focus on the positive and remember that this change will bring good things.

When you arrive at your new home…

Enroll your child in a sport, religious group, 4-H club or other activity. It is often hard for children to meet friends in the neighborhood right away. If school has started, ask your child lots of positive questions and be genuinely excited to hear about the new class and new friends.
Allow your child some time to communicate with old friends but also encourage them to spend time with new friends.
Stay in close contact with your child’s school so that you are aware of how your child is responding in the new environment. Stay on top of homework and other commitments and don’t be afraid to check in with your child’s teacher.
Older children often need to make this adjustment on their own. You can help by expressing interest in their lives and by being patient.
Don’t bend the rules or allow your child to get away with misbehavior because you are worried that they are sad. Set rules and stick to them just as you did before the move. Doing so will help prepare your child for moving and other major life changes in their own adult lives.

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